Talking Blues




I got a gal, six feet tall,
Sleeps in the kitchen with her feet in the hall,
Eatin' hogs' eyes,
Spittin’ out the chitlins,
She loves ice cream,
‘specially with gravy.


I was out in the wild wood, settin' on a log,
My finger on the trigger and my eye on a hog;
I pulled that trigger and the gun went "zip",
And I caught that hog with all of my grip;
He got away, still i didn’t really need him anyhow,
Had an awful lot of fun shootin’ at him though.


I was down in the hen house on my knees,
When I thought I heard a chicken sneeze,
Weren’t nothin’ but the rooster sayin' his prayers,
Thankin' the Lord for the hens upstairs.
Rooster prayin', hens a-layin',
Poor little pullets just pluggin' away best they know.


Now I don’t have to work too hard,
‘cos I got a gal in the rich folks' yard,
And she’s out there workin’,
And I’m up here sleepin’,
Dreamin’ about her,
Her and three other women.


The other day I took me a wife,
And I got me a son, he’s the pride of my life,
And he rubs mashed potatoes in my hair,
Slides them string beans up my nose,
says “you’re my paw …. aintcha?”

extra verse:,
If you want to get to heaven, let me tell you what to do,
You gotta grease your feet in a little mutton stew,
Slide right out of the devil's hand,
And ease over to the Promised Land,
Take it easy, go greasy!

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